Day 9 without Dan

I gotta go to the hospital...

My nostrils have been giving me problems lately. Not that I'm having flu or sinus which is causing the problems, but green, thick phlegm has been continuously flowing from my nostrils to my throat, that I have to spit them out continuously. At times, my right cheek will be in pain. I ignored it thinking it was because of heatiness that caused this pain. This has been happening for about 3 weeks. I do not know what is the cause, but I suspect there's an infection. Oh gosh..what a good time to be sick.

I've got another company that came back to me today for a job interview. Well, at least I know that it's worth all the searching. I'm happy to know there's still hope and I'm gonna have to be there by 25th Apr again. I called Dan last night, asking for directions to go to the interview place. I'm glad he didn't shun me off and treat me coldly. It's a relief to know that he still cares for me.

Dan assured me the reason this happened to us is not because of another person, or any other 3rd party. This time, it's more specific and precise, assuring me with God being his witness. He told me he would be honest to me he is with somebody. I can't say or give strong evidence to support my reasons for believing in him, but I know him well to believe him at some point. I know how honest, serious and responsible especially he will be when it comes to God. This is the Dan I know, and have always believed in.

Although I'm a little relieved, I'm still confused. I hope I don't have to think so much. I do not want to suspect or get worried so much, as I know God will handle this for me. I leave and submit them all to God. God will take care of this for me. If my Lord is with me, who can be against me? I've submit my life to God. I should let Him take over the steering wheel, and I shall rest in His arms, with comfort and peace.

I don't know whether I could find any better ones for a life partner. I just know that I've missed a very very good one in my life. Someone who loves God so much, and could always lead me to God. Someone who reminds me of God's love. Don't push me away, Dan. Please don't. I'm more than shattered to loose you. I'm only clinging to God with every last bit of strength I could find inside me. You know how much I love you. You know how much it hurts for me to loose you. I miss you....