My 1st week in SG~

Finally I get to get my hands on my blog! It's been 1 whole week + 2 days of tiredness n Internet-less days in this new foreign place...



Mon, 16th July, 10.25am was my flight, SQ 191 to SG.



Some of my faithful, loving n caring buddies went all the way to the airport to send me away. They knew, it wasn't a normal holiday trip for me, but a trip where I'm heading towards a new beginning of a new job n a new life. All of them; Simon, Camilia and Liang, woke up pretty early in the morning, careless about their normal wake up time for work and went all the way to the airport. Simon was the one that fetched me at that wee hours of the morning. We all know him; he's a nightbird, and that's the time where he would normally go to sleep. He's surely the man! I thank God for them and I really appreciate their friendship, love and care for me.



Oh well, we had our breakfast at the airport sharing the last time together before I flew off. "Well, this is it", I thought and so i stepped on board. I made a few calls to Mom, Dad, Grandma n Aunt Shann before the take-off. I expressed to Aunt Shann that I'm not confident enough to live alone and I'm not a person with a good attitude and behaviour, as I had a bad blow from Aunt Maggie the nite before for my mistakes and bad attitudes which I never realised. But then, she told me that I was not a failure, but a potential person who hasn't enough confidence. She told me that she has faith in me and will never give up on me although the others do. I was very touched, and I couldn't hold it any longer but to let my tears rolled down my cheeks. As it is, this was it. I took my 1st step on board as the 1st step to start everything anew; to change my bad attitudes and characters, to be a better person for God and learn to love others like Jesus does.

It was my first time at Changi Airport, and I never could've imagined it would be a long walk to the Arrival dept. I met one of my batchmates upon arrival and we're located at the hotel for a week before training. That began our hectic week. We're running here n there almost everyday to settle our EPs, bank a/c, phone line and looking for houses. Surely enough, I saw God's hands upon me n Anastasia. I got my room on the 2nd day in SG at a very fair n reasonable price, much lower than the market rates. It was certainly that our prayers were answered. Much better, the owner n our housemates are all Christians. God is good.



Although hectic, we managed to steal some time to walk around the city and did a little shopping ( Gee, that was fun as it was the Great SG sale season!) . We also managed to have a lil' treat ourselves (when waiting for our EP to be processed) in a small restaurant called "记得吃". They have lotsa very special HK 糖水/ chinese dessert and it was a guarantee-ing satisfaction. Nice and special. I bet Mom, Grandma n Aunt Shann will love it alot ;). Here are some sneak peeks at the pics and you bet I'm gonna bring them there one day!



Oh well, n so it goes. God's definitely here with me, and I thank God each n everyday for His goodness. May He continue to be with us, and may we shine for Him in everything we do. This is the starting, and a renewal of my faith n love to my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.

It's my 2nd day in training now, I'll update more on the next entry. Stay tuned!

I'm Feeling Lonely Already..

I wonder what's wrong with me...I'm feeling lonely already right now. The fact that I've to leave all my friends and close ones makes me feel so alone like a stranger in a new place. Now I really understand how it feels to leave my home and going to a new place.

Simon's told me about how he feels for his girlfriend and how he misses her a lot. And I'm really glad for him that he has so much love for her and their relationship is great. Although there're things that are not so right from Simon, I still wish him the best with his 'Chellam' for years to come =). Camilia is doing with good with Herman. They are always forgiving each other and Herman's always so loving to her no matter what happens. This are such great examples that one must learn from them. I pray earnestly that God will take care of them.

I'm concerned of alot of things actually. I'm concerned about the people that I'm about to meet and whether I'm matured enough to handle tough situations and overcoming loneliness. I know it's gonna be tough. I'm concerned whether I'll be protected and whether there is anyone there for me in times of difficulty.

I know God will be there for me. I know He will protect me and bring great people to help me. I know I need to place my trust in God. I know it very well. But I've to admit, sometimes it's easier said than done. I always have my weaker side. I'm gonna really sit down n pray tonight to talk to my Father in Heaven.

There used to be someone there for me. But I've to learn how to be independent now. It's gonna be just me and God...I know I shouldn't be thinking back, and trying to be dependent on someone else, but I thought that's what a girl really really wants in life; to find a life partner where she can place her trust n love into. And right now, I've to start a new journey all over again. Guess I'm just not that strong enough..

Dear Father, please comfort me with Your presence. I'm really feeling very awkward right now as I pour my feelings out. It's just a feeling of loneliness, and no more than that I hope. I'm not as strong as people think. I'm not as matured as I thought I am. I need a lot of support. Please give me wisdom and mould me into a better and wiser person for You. I feel very empty inside at times. Only You can fill me up Lord. I wanna deal with myself before I could deal with people. It seems like I'm a problematic child, but I know I'll always have a better side in Your eyes. Please fill me with Your love, and do not leave me. I need You, dear Father.

Counting Down to the Days...

It's 2 days and counting...Boy I can't wait! haha.

Gee, suddenly time seemed so precious. I couldn't get enough of staying back here. I know I'm gonna miss my buddies and the place where I spent my study n youth years altogether. I'm gonna miss the time singing together with my best buds. This place was where I grew in my passion in music. It was where I established my status in singing.

It was music that brought me love, and music that took my love away. It was music that showed what I really wanted in life. It was music that brought me into a different path of life. It was God's blessings to me. But I know somehow, God's telling me that it's not the time yet for me pursue music at this moment. I must learn how to have faith and follow His will.

I went to sign my bond and collect the air ticket for the Monday flight with Mom and Camilia. Mom and Dad's really going all out for me this time. Well, this is how it goes. We leave to secure a better future and our parents will always be loving, caring and worrying about us. Don't worry Mom and Dad, I won't dissapoint you.

I had a few last hang outs with my buds over the week talking and crapping just about everything. Friends are really important in life. Although they come and go, God's put them there for us in that point of time for a reason and purpose. And that's we must appreciate them for all the efforts they've done for us. I pray that God will bless my buds with a good life and future and continue to make good music. May their dreams be fulfilled.

I'm gonna be leaving soon, and I won't be able to catch up with you guys soon. Do take care, may you be blessed for your future undertakings. So long guys. Will see ya when I come back =).

~HUGS to you all~

I'm Gonna Miss Home ;~(

Yeah I know, I've always been looking forward to this..I've always wanted to start a new life and future..But deep down right now, I'm feeling a lil' sad....

I know I'm gonna be missing home again, that's for sure. Mom n Dad's come to a good'ol age, and I'm leaving them once again. I can see them going all out for all of us; their children and their love towards us. I can't barely see them not having a good life at an old age later on. But I know that Dad wants me their children to be with him..

Wait, Mom n Dad. Wait for me. Until I get myself settled down I'll try my best to help out the family. And when I've settled down in somewhere safe and nice, I'll bring you to come stay with me and have a good life. I've got dreams, dreams to have a better life and a dream to see my parents happy, that I did not dissapoint them and their investment in me is all worth while.

Dear Father in Heaven, please take care of my parents, and bless them with long life and good health so that they'll live long enough to spend their precious time together and with their children, and also with their grandchildren. We're all older now, not the kids anymore who used to ride our scooters in our good'ol house compound. It's time for us to fulfill our responsibilities as their children n God's children. Please guard our hearts, that we may not fall into temptation, but ultimately be secured in the hands of our Lord Jesus Christ n we will shine for You n fulfill Your purpose in us for Your Glory.

Back to Freedom Again~

I'm having mixed feelings right now..a lil' excited and a lil' sad. I'm excited because I'm heading to a new place to face a new challenge, and a sad because I'm gonna miss home and friends. I'm not gonna be able to be back so often again, and it's a whole new world I've to face out there, all alone...

Well, I'm blessed enough because God's blessed me with some friends and relatives there that could help me through the whole journey. This time, going through a whole new journey all by myself is totally different thing. To be honest, it's not burdening, and I've no extra reponsibilities, worries or concern that I've to consider to make any further steps. It's whole lot easier without that extra burden on my shoulders. Being all by myself, I've allowed myself to dream even more and to achieve greater things in life. People dream before they could achieve things, or else, we'll be just another ordinary visionless person on earth.

Got my stuffs all packed up for the flight..and a few more things to settle before I could leave this country in peace. I haven't stopped travelling for the past 5 months, but later on, I'll be staying put in one place for at least 4 months. That oughta be challenging, coz I get to explore a whole new country to me. It's a whole new place with a whole new culture and people.

And this time, I'm gonna be experiencing total freedom! haha. Well, not totally freedom, coz I'm not gonna betray myself and betray God with things that are not supposed to be done. God's always watching, and I'm not gonna let Him down. Will be looking for a good church and have a new beginning altogether. It's true to the saying "birds of a feather, flock together". We should be together as Christians to strengthen us spiritually and to encourage each other to be closer to God. I realised it's very easy for a lone sheep to get lost in the wilderness and be tempted by satan to follow him and his ways...hmm...not a very good idea. I oughta be looking for a good flock while I'm still conscious.

One very important thing that I've come to learn, is that God's never left us at anytime, even though we left Him. He always wants to speak to us, but we didn't allow Him to come near us. We close our ears and eyes, and we ignored Him for good. Till one very fine day, we realise that we're trying to run the path all on our own and things doesn't seem to go as well because we chose to be independent from God. And we started to realise how wonderful God's presence could be, coz we'll feel His joy and peace, knowing that He's taking care of us the whole time, not leaving a single step from us.

Day 65 without Dan- Ready?? Get Set n Go

It's more than 2 months now..And I could still manage to come back to square one. How can I be so easily shaken? How can I be so easily affected? I still can't be alone..

Over the times, I started to realise I've changed to become an impatient and emotional person. I started to react irrationally at times when emotions take place. Maybe because I've moved far away from God, and I refused to listen to Him and let Him take His place in my heart. I grew cold, ignorant and started to take things into my own hands. I didn't lift my burdens to God anymore. I know He's waiting for me, but I'm ignorant.

And so, the challenge is, am I ready now? To take up the challenges that's installed for me ahead..to ignore all bad things that could affect me and start moving on with life? I'm certainly looking forward to a new life, but am I ready for it yet? I guess this question is too late to be asked, coz ready or not I'm still gonna be heading to work already. I have to be strong, get set, and GO!

These 2 weeks have been hectic for me. I've been travelling up and down again to KL n PG to pay a visit to Aunt Shan n grandma before I leave. I'm also trying to squeeze in some time to spend some time with mom n dad, then I've to be back to PG to work for 1 week to earn some money to have enough for my "migration". I guess I won't be able to see them for quite some time already, so I better make use of this time to do so.

It's something new for me, coz I'll be on my own with no one to take care of me anymore, being alone there. Surely, there're still my relatives and friends there, but I'm living all by myself now, and I really shouldn't be doing anymore mistakes now. I cannot afford to repeat the same mistakes again. I have to improve myself, and be more aware of myself and the others so that I won't offend them in anyway.

I pray to God that I'll be wiser, and to care more for others and not to take people for granted anymore. I want to draw near to God and be loved again. I want to be with Him again.